this freedom thing

Well, people have been very nice to me, with a number of posts, so I’m making the rounds trying to return the favor. The only problem is that now that it comes down to it, I’m not sure what to write about. I considered blogging the current book I’m reading, Snow Crash a Neuromancer type book that I really don’t have time for. Or, I could go on about the relationships between French, Spanish, English, and Arabic, and the odd ways they connect. Ignoring, of course, how little half a semester will teach someone. Maybe I could talk about Nepal, how we may be documenting the growth of fascism, and the little points of light that can cheer you up. I could write about almost anything.

It’s almost annoying, though. Sometimes, you get into what is called ‘analysis paralysis’, the other side of freedom. Doing what other people tell you is a piece of cake. Sure, every once in a while, you need to stretch and press the edges of the cage, but for the most part it’s a simple, easy life. Never need to think for yourself, never have to go beyond the set boundaries except for a few predictable oddities. Freedom though, whether to write and blog, or to choose a career, or to do whatever, imposes a much more terrifying requirement. Why, a person actually needs to think; the consequences of ones actions are on their own head. It’s much more fun to hitch a ride on someone else’s risks and ideas. It’s empty though, at least for me. Even with the difficulties, the knowledge that every single action I take is mine and mine alone, that I do it by my own free will, is an amazing one. It’s almost frightening, realizing the possible limitless choices.

There is a quote I found, by Theodore Roosevelt, one of my favorite presidents.

“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.”

To daring.

-john shanks. of Polis.

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